Dear Beautiful: It's time to start working on how you see yourself....
In the beginning of the week I did a post about not always feeling beautiful and the hard work it took to start feeling better about myself. Can you relate to this? I am pretty sure there's someone out there that can. It's also important to know that beauty isn't just about what you see on the outside, but what you feel on the inside too. Also, Beauty isn't about what other's see... this is all about you right now and how you see yourself. So let's talk about, feeling beautiful about yourself inside and out.
The first kind of beautiful I want you to think about is Inner Beauty. I hope that you have had the chance to realize that beauty isn't always about what you see but it's about how you feel. Do you feel as though you are a good person? Have you done things in your life, that makes you feel good about yourself? This type of beauty is an amazing experience and one worth working towards. This kind of beauty comes from a person who is loving, caring, giving and compassionate. I know that when I give and when I help people, I feel my most beautiful. It's not a beauty you see, it's a feeling. I also think that people who can connect with others authentically and have intellectual conversations are beautiful. People that can bring value to a conversation are beautiful as well, it's a beauty based on depth.
For the longest time I felt not so beautiful on the outside but what kept me content was knowing that I felt beautiful on the inside. I felt this in the sense that I know who I am, and how I am. I am a very loving person who would save the world if I could (especially from this pandemic, am I right?!) So what are some ways that can help you feel beautiful on the inside?
1. Do one small kind favor for a random stranger. Seriously, it doesn't even have to be big. It takes one minute or less to make a lifetime difference to someone else.
2. Have a conversation using your experience and knowledge, to bring value and to help another person through your words. Words are like magic, and if you use your words kindly they can feel like magic.
3.Be kind, not just to others but to yourself. Waking up and starting the day with some really good affirmations is a great way to feel beautiful.
The importance about doing any of these things though is doing it with a selfless love, without expecting anything in return. One thing to keep in mind, when you do random acts of kindness, don't overwhelm or overload yourself by helping others. Also, when you are doing these things, make sure you take the time to acknowledge how beautiful it is to be so kind.
The Second type of beauty is
Outside Beauty not by others' point of view, but by your own. This was the hardest one for me to see and feel. which I talked about in the first post. So what did I do to turn it around? A lot of things!
1. I started to accept compliments, not because I wanted or needed someone else to make me feel good, but because I took it as a reminder that I am not as bad as I tell myself I am. The more I heard others say nice things to me the more I made it a habit to do the same.
2. I got tired of how I looked, I wanted to look good for me, no one else but me. So I made Routines that ensured I would do better and look better. I went to bed early, and woke up early. Everyday I made sure I drank as much water as I could. I worked out hardcore for 15 mins. and walked for 30 minutes. By doing this I felt beautiful because of the weight I lost, and because of how beautiful I felt on the inside. I felt beautiful on the inside because I was so determined, so dedicated and I am accomplishing my goals.
3. I started to study myself, I looked in the mirror and went against all A.N.T.'s (automatic negative thoughts). I complimented myself and did daily affirmations. If I did happen to slip and have an A.N.T. pop up I would take whatever complaint I had about me and then I had to add a compliment about the same thing I just criticized.
4. I made it a habit, a routine, to be good to myself and I stuck to it every day. This is how feeling beautiful and believing it, became a little easier. The more I said good things, and did good things for me, the more I believed I was beautiful.
5. Selfies, I am not even kidding you! I took selfies for me... and I also posted selfies literally all the time and not for the likes but because this was another way to see myself. Kind of like looking in the mirror, I studied my pictures and I really felt good about myself. It made me happy that I didn't have to take 20 pics before I finally accepted one and I felt good enough about it, enough to post it. That's the thing, a few practice shots and I felt more than "Enough", I felt beautiful. I like my pics, even without tons of filters (although there were some filters just because it was fun) and again... without 20 tries before I got one I liked.
6. This one is deep, I took old photo's and I remembered each one and each time of my life I was in, during the time it was taken. I remember all the criticizing words my own family and friends said and I realized that none of those things were true. I refused to believe that the horrible things that were said, was true. I had to tell myself I didn't deserve that and I should've never believed them or listened. Kind of like the journal entry I talked about in my mobile app and on social media, talk to your inner child and tell her (or him) what they needed to hear. Be the support you needed at that moment.
Going through all of these steps really helped me be able to look in the mirror and feel beautiful and believe it. It helped me be more comfortable in my own skin. Most importantly it helped me gain back a piece of Peace, I didn't have for the longest time. I am living a much happier life because I woke up one day and chose to change the way I see and feel about myself.
How are you feeling after reading this? Motivated hopefully, maybe even inspired? Inspired to start taking care of you? I hope that is the case because I know how hard life is when you don't feel beautiful or believe it. The hardest part is always going to be believing that you are beautiful. This takes practice, patience and lots of time on yourself. So until self-love and feeling beautiful takes full effect... just make sure you start with being kind to you. I would love to hear your journey rather you are needing to learn to feel beautiful OR if you have found a way to feel beautiful. Please drop a comment! Also please share this post if you know someone who needs to read it. I hope you have a day as beautiful as you are! Because in my books everyone is beautiful...and deserves to feel beautiful too.
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