There is beauty in everything, even the storms...
Everything we go through there's a lesson. Some of our greatest lessons come from the biggest storms! There is truth in the phrase "everything happens for a reason". We may not understand it and we may not like it sometimes, but the phrase is true. When we take the time to appreciate the hard times we learn to look for the opportunity to learn and grow. When I was younger I use to hate the phrase "Everything happens for a reason", it was so annoying and I thought it was meaningless, just something parents say to get you to go away. Now...it's a complete different story. When something is happening that is hard, frustrating or even maddening I slow down and ask myself "okay, what am I suppose to learn". It's not always easy to see the lesson behind things but that's why you have to slow it down. It's all about changing our mindset, instead saying "why is this happening to me", ask yourself "why is this happening for me". Just changing that one word, changes your whole mindset! It's a beautiful experience when you can change your mindset.
It's not easy to always look on the bright side, when you see the storm coming your way. Storms are ugly, dark, and full of uncertainty and it can get chaotic quick. Natural instinct is to panic, the fight or flight kicks in way too easy and way too fast. What would happen though if you slowed down and your new instinct was to stand still? What if, you took a stance and decided that there is no storm in your life big enough to scare your or shake you? Like any real storm the first thing we do is find shelter, we find a strong foundation that is (hopefully) unshakeable. What if I told you that your mind body and soul is your shelter, your foundation.... and it's a matter of learning to trust it?! Now it is important to know that it's okay to have bad days, even the most positive and uplifting people have bad days. What matters is how we react, and how we shine after the storm is over.
Sometimes we see a storm coming, other times it can catch us off guard. In order to trust our mind body and soul we must slow down and focus on each of these areas. Build a strong foundation in each of these areas for present and future storms.
Your Mind: The first thing to do is to practice slowing down and thinking when we feel the fight or flight coming on. The first thing anyone tells you in a literal storm (or a metaphorical storm) is, remain calm. You cannot think clearly if you are in a panic. Panicking never did anyone any good. It is important as we grow, as we transition... to teach ourselves how to slow down and think before we react. For every action there is a reaction... another one of those annoying but true phrases. Being positive and learning to stay positive takes a LOT of time and practice. It's just like any real habit, you have to practice it consistently until you no longer have to try so hard, it just comes naturally. Train your Brain so when things happen, you are ready to embrace the storms, not run from them. The beauty in taking care of your mind is that you will always come out stronger, smarter and better.
Your Body: If by chance you are lucky enough to recognize a storm when it's coming then you need to tend to your body before things get bad. Again, during a physical storm (like a tornado) what is the first thing you do? You protect your body. Now when there is a metaphorical storm, it's the same thing. Protect your body by doing more intentional self-care. If anyone here is reading this and is like me, then you understand me when I say; my body is the first thing to react to stressful situations. My body tenses up during stressful times. Depending on the situation I get shaky or I clench my teeth or worst yet I get this automatic system shut down and I sleep all the time. So why wait until the storm is here, why not (like I said earlier) take a stance...Be ready for anything. Prepare and practice your relaxation methods before and during storms so that you don't feel it physically. If you don't have any relaxation methods, never really paid attention to it or tried it before and need guidance then let's talk about it. The beauty in taking care of your body is that no matter what happens you will feel ready before things get rough and refreshed after the storm passes.
Your Soul: Everyone has a different way to take care of their soul. I like to take care of my soul (especially during the storms) by being in a quiet place. When everything else around me is rough or chaotic, I HAVE to be in a quite place. I never really meditated but it is something on my list of things I want to learn. I like to take warm showers or soak in a warm bath. I like to channel my creativity and do something artistic. The thing I like the most is to allow myself to just lay in bed and look out the window and admire the stillness. I guess for me the best thing for my soul is peace. The beauty in taking care of your soul is that you can get through anything and still stay true to yourself.
Lightening or Light? It's all about your mindset. In the end after you practice these methods, check in with yourself. See if you are able to notice the difference between lightening: sparks of fear/fight or flight ..or.. light: sparks of inspiration through the storm. If you are experiencing lightening in your personal storms it's okay just keep working on your Automatic Thoughts. Consistently practice slowing down and thinking of the results you want and then create them. Remember habits take time and consistency so don't take it hard when you don't get it right the first time. No matter what adversity comes your way just remember you are strong and you are capable. Work on building your foundation within yourself and you can get through anything!
Reaching for help: Whenever I am struggling through adversity and I don't know what to do and need help or I just need emotional support, I reach out. For most people it is so hard to reach out and ask for help but it is vital to have at least one person you can turn to. I go to my husband, I also go to my 2 best friends. I myself have moments in life that I just don't know how to handle a situation and I need help or I am caught off guard by a horrible situation and need help. When I don't know how to handle a situation, it's because I am already so wound up I can't slow down and think. There is no shame in admitting when you need help. It isn't weak to ask for help, it actually takes a very strong person to say, "I am struggling and I need your opinion and/or help".
If you are going through some hard times and need help to focus on how to get through it and get the outcome you want out of a particular situation, please reach out. I pride myself in being judge free and motivating! I would love to help clear up some mental space so that we can focus on the outcome you want. If you really don't even want any particular outcome and you just want to talk, you want to feel like you are being heard and your voice matters then please reach out. Sometimes we just need someone to sit with us until the storm is over!